The Horde – A Horror Fan’s Review

So, for this week’s ‘Freaky Friday’ review, I’m gonna take a look at a movie that just came out today called ‘The Horde’ from 313 Films.  Let me just say up front, that this movie really stood out among all the other slasher-wannabe movies I’ve seen in the past few years.  It was like taking The Hills Have Eyes and giving us an Action Hero movie at the same time.  So yeah, the horror geek, and b-level action movie fan in me loved this.  And if you’re a fan of teenagers going on a school field trip to the woods, degenerate mutant rednecks, schlocky dialogue, and a former marine out for vengeance.  Then you have found a winner.

Honestly though, I can’t tell which one the director wanted to make more, an action movie or a horror flick.

The movie is not without it’s problems.  The first of which is that it took its sweet time to get going.  But about 35 minutes in I was finally given what I wanted to see, action.  And to be fair, the action wasn’t that bad.  A lot of times action sequences in movies like this are terrible, but this one was a bit above the norm.  Honestly, I loved watching ‘John Crenshaw’ (great action hero name, right), take out the baddies while saying cheesy dialogue to no one but himself.

As for the ‘horror’ bits in this movie… well, let’s just say I was very pleased.  The level of disturbing they find their way to is disgustingly appealing.  You’ll get to see a cook check on a head he’s stewing, take out an eyeball, and eat it for a snack before getting to the real… meat and potatoes of the situation.  You’ll also be treated to a ‘purdy’ young lady being nailed to a table in very ‘precocious’ manner.  It’s that kind of terror-tastic goodness that makes this movie stand out.  And hey, who doesn’t love tons of fake and cgi blood flowing everywhere?  I know I do.

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Also, the sound design for this movie is top notch.  Like. for realsies.  When something ‘epic’ happens, like seeing a hand appear, reaching up to grab on to a cliff’s edge, the music let’s you know that it happened with a thunderous noise.  Hah, it’s classic, yo!

Yeah, again, there are some terribly boring parts, the dialogue is not gonna win any writing awards, and the decisions made by ‘all’ the characters are awful, but if having our hero wait around for ‘the horde’ to show up just to make a statement with a flaming arrow to one of their faces, with an epic guitar riff playing in background is wrong.  I don’t know if I want it to be right.  Where else are you gonna find the hero saying ‘Hey, Sling Blade’ right before killing one of the poor mutant bastard?

So there you have it.  If you’re a fan of low budget action-horror-thrillers, then you’ve found your Friday night gorefest.  Enjoy.

Overall Rating: 6.8 out of 10

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The movie is available as of today May 6th 2016 on iTunes, VUDU, and other fine VOD… getting places.

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Trailer:

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Amber Neko

Amber is a podcaster, writer, reviewer, and super geek. She is a host of the Nerd Squadron podcast, and longtime host of Transition Transmission. She writes in her spare time, mostly science fiction, and cyberpunk. And tries her best to be good at it ;p